THE HEART OF IT
2018
Hand-drawn animation with sound
10:04 min.

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Back
and back
and back
through time,
before we folded
sound into words,
we were like birds.

You have been spinning,
and spinning,
orbiting something
that holds you with magnetic force.
How intimate, this circling,
this grinding against the air,
and how isolating,
to be always reaching,
never touching the heart of it,
never knowing for sure what it means.

Are you ready?
Are you ready?
Are you ready?
Are you ready?

Slow and steady,
slow and steady,
slow and steady,
slow and steady.

Right now, someone is dying / Someone is falling asleep / Someone is watching the clock / Someone is opening a window / Someone is at war with their body, wishing they could be a tree, or a stone, or a cloud, anything but this / Someone is diving into the ocean / Someone is holding a vibrating phone / Someone is laughing, alone in their car / Someone is giving birth / Someone is running out of money / Someone is taking a photo of their own face / Someone is swallowing a scream / Someone is nauseous with fear, escaping the only home they've ever known, while the husk of someone else holds a gun in shaky hands / Someone is writing a long, vulnerable email / Someone is being taught that their desires are wrong / Someone is peeling an orange / Someone is trying to say no / Someone is dancing ecstatically / Someone is making assumptions about a stranger / Someone is struggling to say sorry / Someone is pushing a small seed into wet soil / Someone is pretending not to be in pain / Someone is unsuccessfully drinking to forget / Someone is coming out, and someone is learning how to walk / Right now, someone is gently, gently, kissing someone else's thigh, and someone is burying their face in the soft belly fur of a cat / Someone is stealing to survive / Someone was just told that they have an incurable disease / Someone is cocooned in their bed, with their computer's bright screen showing them the way that someone else's body moves / Someone is self-conscious / Someone is praying / Someone is worrying / Someone is inexplicably slipping away from the one they love / Someone is rolling the perfect joint / Someone is falling down the stairs / Someone is strumming a guitar / Someone is making coffee / Someone is ashamed / Someone is drawing a circle / Someone is tasting chocolate / Right now, someone is trying to understand / Someone is feeling like they do not belong here / Someone is sensing, for the first time, the way that their childhood lives on in their muscles, in their reactions, in the lens that covers and colors their experience of this place / Right now, someone is coming home, and someone is singing.

Cause and effect.
This happens now
because that happened
way back when.
It is embedded in your bones,
your brain, your skin.
One more rotation
around the sun,
and so we spin.
Repeat the dance we learned
from politics and kin.
Where do the edges meet?
When does the cycle end?

You are water,
you are water.
Don't forget to flow,
don't forget what you know.
You are moving
even when you feel frozen,
the spring will come
and change you
into something new
and free.
Just remember to breathe.
Just remember to remember
where you came from.

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THE HEART OF IT